Pandemic outbreak makes parenting circumstance even more difficult.

COVID-19 pandemic, which has been spreading across the globe for nearly three years now as its effect first showed in 2020, has brought severe impact to the world, but has it also aggravated difficulties on parenting?  On the eve of Children’s Day, Child Welfare League Foundation (CWLF) published this year’s (2022) “Current Parenting Status & Post-Pandemic Family Playtime Trend Survey.” Per the survey, even though there are nearly 90% of parents with children younger than 6 years old who feel that parenting is satisfying, there are still more than half of the parents who feel “defeated (56%), stressed (53.6%).” The main reason that has caused parenting stress was not necessarily that parents “felt difficult to raise a child;” instead, it was that most parents have not adapted to the situation.

The survey found that more than 60% of the parents have had the experiences of being unable to control their tempers with their children sometimes; and more than half of the parents have had disparate views on parenting with other family members. In addition, nearly 30% of working parents express that it is difficult to find balance between work and family. Even though everyone (97.3%) agrees that timely rest and destressing are necessary, in reality fewer than half of the parents (48.4%) have personal break time every day. Moreover, when confronting parenting obstacles, majority of the public is still used to finding solutions online or asking their families and friends; fewer than 25% of the people would proactively seek professional assistance.

Guest Ms. Hsiao, who has a 3-year-old daughter, indicated precisely that she is also one of the mothers who has sought help online. But she found that most of the data on the internet are generic. “Not every situation can be solved so easily like the internet says. After I got to know CWLF and was able to consult with the professionals, I gradually became less stressed, and I also got better at resolving my parenting difficulties timely. With that experience, I started to introduce helpful resources to my mom friends.”

CWLF CEO Li-Fang Pai noted that, “In addition to existing childrearing difficulties, the COVID-19 pandemic has also brought dramatic changes to parents and their children. What makes it especially heartbreaking is the group of young children who have been forced to wear masks from birth. Living under pandemic restrictions, children’s outdoor activities, along with their play spaces, times, and buddies, are all being restrained. Our survey found that more than 70% of the parents are afraid to take their children out to play for fear of contracting COVID. 36% of the parents are afraid of their children contracting COVID when playing with other kids, so their children lose playmates. In addition, about 30% of the parents point out that children’s playtimes have reduced (30.1%). What is being replaced is the significant increase of using electronic devices and home video game consoles. The survey found that the percentage of children using electronic devices has risen from 6.5% to 19%, and the percentage of children playing home video game consoles has also increased from 2% to 9.5%. I truly worry about the long-term impact on the behaviors, cognition and social skills of these young children who have been immersed in the world of screens.”

Guests Ms. Hsiao and Ms. Cheng, who both have young children at home, also point out, if it is not due to family’s support or children’s sleep time, it is really hard to have their own break times. And even if they have their own free times, they would also need to worry about and plan their children’s activities after they wake up.

Child’s right to play can’t wait.

Parenting shall never be a lone battle. When observing parents’ childrearing conundrums, it becomes even clearer that the period before 3 years old is the critical time for children to build attachment with their parents. And it is the reason why CWLF has successively established “Welcome to Our Comfort Zone Services” and “Parent Support Community Service Centers.” Through allowing the parents to realize their needs of taking good care of themselves or empowering the moms and dads with parent education on responsive care, CWLF has been helping parents and children to build a stable and solid sense of attachment and security, so that they could further enjoy the wonderful moments of being together.

Parenting brings sense of satisfaction; yet, more than 50% of parents have had discouraged emotions but didn’t know how to handle.

Our survey found that, nearly 90% of parents with young children (89%) believe that, “Raising kids is very satisfying, but undoubtedly, during the childrearing process, parents are frequently under high pressure. CWLF’s survey found that, more than half of the parents have felt discouraged while raising their children; more than 40% of the parents “feel that they have failed their parental duties (46.5%) and feel anxious (40.5%).” But are these really issues about the children?

In fact, problems from the adults’ world would actually reflect on parenting. Our survey noted that 61.3% of the parents express that sometimes they are unable to control their emotions when dealing with their children. Inconsistent views on parenting among the family members also trouble the parents: 51.3% note having inconsistent parenting views with the older generation; more than 30% of the parents have discrepant parenting views from their partners. When facing parenting obstacles, most parents would search for information online (81%), and secondly, they would seek help from their friends and colleagues (69.8%). Parents are less accustomed to using official parenting resources. For instance, only 14.9% of the parents would participate in parent education classes or apply for related services. But the survey noted that parents who utilized official parenting resources performed better on parent-child interaction and responses than those without. How to elevate the accessibility and attraction of official parenting resources are topics that worth further discussions.

Timely break times prompt better parent-child interactions, but fewer than half the parents have personal time off every day.

CWLF discovered while performing the survey that almost all parents recognize that having timely break time and destressing are necessary in childrearing (97.3%). And when parents have enough rest time, the parenting obstacles and discouraged emotions they face would be relatively less, and children would also enjoy a better relationship with their parents. It would bring extremely positive impacts for both the caretakers and the children. However, there are still more than half of the parents who have not had sufficient rest time (52.6%). Whether it is full-time moms and dads who have no days off all year round, or working parents who have to juggle in between, how to allocate childrearing and self-recovery times has become a new lesson of family cooperation.

Lack of family playtimes and spaces; use of electronic devices grow threefold.

“Play” is the ability and right that every child was born with. Great playtimes will provide children with stimuli and promote their health and psychological, emotional, social, and cognitive developments.  However, as structures of modern families continue to transform, CWLF found that nearly 20% (18%) of the parents have fewer than one hour of playtime with their children every day. Under the circumstance of lacking siblings and playmates, almost 23.7% of the children can only play alone. Especially as the pandemic took over the globe, opportunities for children’s outdoor playtimes have reduced. More than 70% of the parents worry about being contracted with COVID and therefore shy away from taking the children to play outside; and more than half of the parents would take extra cautions to ensure if the playing sites have been properly sanitized.  Also, chances for the children to be in contact with their playmates have reduced (36% of the children don’t have any playmates). What have been replaced are the usage times for electronic devices and home-use game consoles; compared with 2020 survey, there is more than a threefold increase (percentage of children between 3 to 6 years old playing electronic devices have risen from 6.5% to 19%; percentage of those playing home-use consoles have increased from 2% to 9.5%). World Health Organization also recommends that children younger than 2 years old shall not look at the screens; and for children between 2 and 5 years old, screen time shall be less than 1 hour or none.

And for those parents who long to take their kids out to burn off their energy, they have also long been bothered by the fact that there are not enough options of play spaces and facilities. From the survey, more than half of the parents (51.2%) express that, besides parks within their communities, there are no other appropriate sites to take their children to play. Play facilities lacking safety and age appropriateness have also implicitly infringed children’s rights of choosing their play space.

To safeguard child’s right to play, CWLF is making the following recommendations:

CEO Li-Fang Pai explained CWLF’s motive to proactively develop various aspects of childcare support services for infants and young children over the past couple years, “In this era of information explosion, parents would often feel helpless on the road of raising their infants and young children.  When they encounter parenting conundrums due to their own or children’s issues, they would often look for information on the internet or ask their families or friends, but the answers they receive would not necessarily resolve their concerns. With this phenomenon in mind, CWLF is hoping that through classes of light content, support groups, and a parent-child friendly space, parents would be supported. They would be able to consult with an eased mind, learn how to parent positively, and cultivate techniques of building parent-child attachment relationships. At the same time, parents are also reminded to practice taking good care of themselves and to avoid having unbearable stress that may cause uncontrollable emotions, so that their parent-child relationship would be positively nurtured.”

    ※Parenting is a long and winding journey; it is necessary to take timely breaks, destress, and fully utilize parenting resources

Parents’ physical and mental states are likely to reflect during their parenting. As parents feel their childrearing stress rising, they shall pay more attention to their own conditions and take timely breaks, destress, as well as fully utilize various parenting resources. Parents can seek formal assistance, such as parent education classes, toll-free parenting helplines, etc., so that their parenting journey would bring more happiness and less hardship. 

    ※Let children indulge in playtimes; reduce screen times on electronic devices

In order to safeguard children’s right to play, besides having ample and safe physical facilities, there shall also be playmates. Parents could arrange at least one hour of playtime with their children every day so as to enhance parent-child interactions and avoid preschoolers to be overly exposed to electronic devices, which may impact children’s behaviors, cognition, and social skills. Ms. Cheng also shared the way she spends time with her 3-year-old son, “Even if I couldn’t think of a game to play, I’d have my kid do some household chores with me, like asking him to help me wash the vegetables or sweep the floor; these are all great opportunities to teach a child through learning.”

CWLF Infant and Young Children Parenting Support Services

  【Parent Support Community Service Centers】

Having the framework of UNICEF’s “Nurturing Care” as the foundation of our service plan, CWLF has established “Parent Support Community Service Centers” all over Taiwan, creating space for both children and adults to thrive. A interactive play space for parents and kids 0 to 3 years old is provided, and parent education classes on responsive care are also offered.  Professional educare teachers and social workers give one-on-one parenting consultation sessions with the parents, helping to ameliorate parenting stress and allowing the parents to fully enjoy the wonderful moments spent with their children. Service details:

  【Welcome to Our Comfort Zone Services】

Parent-child relationship is mutually nurturing and thriving, where parents and children are independent, yet also codependent, individuals. Within our Comfort Zones, not only do we care for the children, but we also look after children’s most valuable caretakers. We try to prompt the children and adults to learn together, create more opportunities for both sides to take a break to destress, and further allow the caretakers to build support systems among themselves, helping each other to grow. In this way, the two generations will find the most suitable parent-child relationship with one another and create enriched coprosperity in life.
Service details: https://www.children.org.tw/english/service/Childcare